Tuesday, July 31, 2007

this's whats left

i say:
i know i have to clear this mess up myself
i have to undo all the knots.
but the times i spent with her,
i wouldn exchange it for anything else
she might not think so
cos i always say how i regret it
well think.
how am i to feel
when i see them together
she and he
not she and me.i
think she'd feel the same
if she saw her and me
not she and me.
she wont come back
she wont understand the pain.
everyone's saying how dumb i am
doing all these for her
and how she's not worth it
how she's a slut, a cheap fuck
but in my eyes,
i love her cheap or not, slut or not
i think the only reason im still stuck here,
is that i still harbour the hope
that one day she might come backto cure this pain.
but wait, i guess she's more to healing his pain.
so maybe i need time to grab myself up from the sinking sand
and drown these tears in freezing water
so i'll be too numb to feel the pain
and these tears will go away.

they say:
theres actually nothing an outsider can do
& you know how they've called her a bitch a slut
& they never approved of your relationship with her
just that they've been there for the downfalls.
"no one's gna blame you for loving her."
afterall, you dont love someone cos they're perfect
you love them for everything they're not.
and maybe you should let go
by not talking to her at all
i know it kills but its what you have to do.
youre not just some toy
she picks back up for the let down
in another relationship.
maybe she'll want you back
but you'll have to force yourself
to say no.
because you cant let her do this to you.
see her one last time,
fix it into your memory
and leave her forever.

could you trust me if i told you i love you.>